Today is the Best Day Ever

Hello Me? Did I fall into a hole or get stuck in the psych ward for a few months. The winter was cold, ay? My therapist recently mandated a treatment of 60 to 90 minutes alone every day to rep are my inner-compartmentalized bits of self that continually look externally for direction that continually conflicts with other inside segments. So i'm here contemplating my existence, my meaning, my mattering in the context of me as a whole.

O depth of wealth, wisdom, and knowledge of God! 

How unsearchable are God's judgements, 

how untraceable are God's ways! 

The source, guide, and goal of all that is, 

to God be the glory forever! 

(From The Book of Common Worship)

I am one for seeing the people and work directly in my path and following its/their shadow. But not in this moment. Right now I push the eject button on my program disk (which I recognize as corrupt). I stare at a white wall. I don't want to operate from other's program disk. I pray for God to show me a new program that allows me to see me in the equation. Me choosing to be on my own team and care for my needs. I trust him to provide bread and rest and a clear race that I am capable of finishing. I can open my palms to release living based on others mandates. I can let God speak. 

As my kids wake up early, show up often and are forever ready for life and love and play, I want to emulate their freedom while also living in hopeful anticipation. As David said yesterday morning, "Mom, your best day will always be your last one, because you won't know which is best until you have lived it." May today be my best day, tomorrow even better, and the one after the best, until I reach the fourth and its more amazing then I can imaging and so on!